Fox News star lifts the lid on her 'cult-like' childhood with an abusive father who believed he was a Mormon prophet - and forced his eight kids to live in a shed and eat GRASS... telling her she'd be raped and KILLED if she ever fled his reign of terror

Carrie Sheffield's list of accomplishments is long. Very long.

By age 28, she graduated with honors from Brigham Young University, had a full ride scholarship to Harvard for her masters degree, earned a Fulbright fellowship in Berlin, landed an editorial board seat at a national newspaper and worked as a financial analyst on Wall Street.

Today, Sheffield is 41. Her whip-smart takes and effective politicking have made her a popular fixture on Fox News, Fox Business, CNN, MSNBC, Good Morning America and the BBC. 

But behind her perfectly polished appearances, Sheffield says she's been living a lie. 

'I spent years pretending, masking the dark abuse I suffered from my father and other family members. I didn't realize that by suppressing my past, I created a false perfectionism,' she writes in her new memoir, Motorhome Prophecies.

Sheffield was one of eight children born into abject poverty and squalor in a triad of bad situations: abuse, mental illness, and religious fundamentalism.

Among her siblings, she was the only 'lucky' one to be born in a hospital. Her father's deep distrust of doctors meant that her older brother was born in a tent on the public campground of Greenbelt Park, Maryland. 

Sheffield's candid memoir details how she was raised under the thumb of a violent, mentally-ill, street musician father who believed that he was the prophet of the Mormon founder, Joseph Smith. 

Carrie Sheffield, a popular TV personality, known for her appearances on Fox, CNN, and MSNBC has now detailed her harrowing childhood under her mentally ill, abusive father

In her new memoir, Motorhome Prophecies, Sheffield says, 'I spent years pretending, masking the dark abuse I suffered from my father and other family members'

One of eight children, Sheffield says her childhood was defined by chaos, violence and disruption, under the thumb street of her musician father 

They served as a family musical ministry, as Sheffield's father claimed they were on a mission to 'save America from destruction.' The family of ten lived a transient lifestyle, often stopping only for a few months to live in crime-ridden neighborhoods while preaching their father's delusional ramblings and passing out fire-and-brimstone pamphlets

They lived a transient lifestyle, often stopping only for a few months to live in crime-ridden neighborhoods while proselytizing her father's delusional ramblings and passing out fire-and-brimstone pamphlets.

When they weren't camped out in their motorhome in Walmart parking lots, the family of ten lived in tents, sheds, and derelict apartments without running water. 

Her father, Ralph believed that he was put on earth to become president of the United States in order to 'save America from destruction.' He called, it 'the Mission.'

By the time Sheffield was finished with high school, she had attended 17 schools and been homeschooled twice. 

She was the first of her siblings to escape the toxic brainwashing of her father's fundamentalist creed. But when she finally left for college, Ralph prophesized that she would be raped and killed. 

'I was declared legally estranged from my parents,' Sheffield writes. They 'would not allow me to visit home because they claimed I was satanic and would corrupt my siblings by urging them to leave.'

From that day forward, Sheffield was photoshopped out of all family photos.  

Sheffield says her father, Ralph was born and raised in Salt Lake City as the son of a wealthy real estate developer. She describes her grandfather as a 'super Mormon.'

The root of her family's dysfunction began when her father was sexually abused by a babysitter when he was four years old. 

The sitter locked him in a closet, and threatened to kill him if he told anyone about the assault, leaving bite marks all over his body until he passed out. 

Instead of reporting the crime to the police, Ralph's parents did their best to gloss things over. 

Sheffield says this early trauma, 'contributed deeply' to her father's subsequent mental illness, which she lists off as: 'antisocial personality disorder, borderline personality disorder, narcissistic personality disorder, and psychopathy.'

By the time, Sheffield was born in 1983, her parents had already splintered off from the mainstream Mormon church. 

But in keeping with the Mormon doctrine to 'multiple and fill the earth' her mother bore ten children in the span of thirteen years, along with a couple miscarriages and a stillbirth. Two siblings died as infants. Sheffield was the fifth child and the oldest girl.

Ralph's distrust of doctors and hospitals, meant that he delivered all of his children (with the exception of Carrie). It's 'almost as though we lived in medieval times—with Ralph playing midhusband,' she explains. 

Sheffield hailed from an upright Mormon family, and says her grandfather (far left) was a pillar of the community. But her father, Ralph (wearing a tie) became radicalized and cut off all ties with his siblings, accusing them of 'moral decay'

Sheffield's aunt Charlotte was a pageant queen who won Miss America in 1957, and would later inspire Sheffield's own failed attempt at beauty pageants

Sheffield's father, Ralph, was a self-taught music prodigy who made his children form a band to proselytize the word of God. They made money by busking in public places, parks and street corners while Ralph passed out his apocalyptic flyers. 'A good day would net maybe $200–300, a bad day $50 or less,' Sheffield says

Sheffield clarifies that she began calling her father by his first name, 'Ralph,' when she disowned him in 2013. 'I didn't consider him worthy of the intimate title, "Dad,"' she writes in the book. 

Ralph didn't believe in health insurance. To him, it was attached to plodding office jobs held by schmucks who worked from nine to five. 'My employer was Heavenly Father,' Ralph would tell his children. 

It wasn't the only anti-establishment ethos Ralph preached. He also hated the authorities, which he nicknamed 'buttinskies'—as in 'they butt in' to other people's business.

Every time child protective services were called to the Sheffield home, Ralph coached Carrie and her siblings in what to say to the cops. 

'He programmed us to defend him in any circumstance, a result of twice-daily indoctrinations we got during morning and evening Family Prayer,' she says.

Shortly after, they would pack their bags and hit the road—packing ten children into a motorhome, always two steps ahead of the law.

'I dreamed how our lives would be infinitely better if those social workers in Massachusetts successfully took us away,' wrote Sheffield. 

Sheffield says that her father systematically worked at isolating his family from the outside world, so they would have nobody else to rely on. 

'The motorhome enabled his destructive narcissism by yanking us away from any helpers.' 

'Growing up, our Mormon faith was our primary identity, but too often, Ralph's interpretation of this faith—far from mainstream—kept us isolated,' writes Sheffield.

Sheffield adds that her own mother was brainwashed into believing that her family were vile sinners. Later when her sister died from a sudden heart attack, she refused to attend the funeral.  

At one point in Sheffield's childhood, Ralph forced them to live in a shed without running water or electricity, even though there was a 940 square foot house and mobile home on the property. 'It made him feel more righteous by putting everyone in physical misery,' Sheffield writes

Ten people crammed into the shed. During the unbearable winters, the family relied on space heaters that were plugged into rough and ready electrical system provided for by a generator. There was no running water, instead they hooked up a PVC hose or hauled buckets from the outside ground pump. The 'kitchen' was merely a sink with a microwave

Sheffield says that she used to dream of being saved by social workers, but every time child protective services were called, her father coached them in what to say to the cops. 'He programmed us to defend him in any circumstance, a result of twice-daily indoctrinations we got during morning and evening Family Prayer,' writes Sheffield

'The motorhome was Ralph's escape hatch from accountability for his abuse,' wrote Sheffield.  

Ralph was a self-taught musical genius, who earlier in his life was a protégé of virtuoso classical guitarist Andrés Segovia.

After he was fired from his teaching job at Brigham Young University, Ralph gave up his flourishing career in secular music to become a street preacher, forcing his brood of children to partake in what he called 'the Mission.' 

He claimed it was a directive from 'God.' 

'I wasn't a busker by necessity, but from devotion to America,' wrote Ralph in a biographical essay during his failed bid for congress. 'Obedient to the directive I received in answer to prayer about earning my living altruistically . 

And thus, was the genesis of the Sheffield family musical ministry. 

Each child played an instrument. Sheffield played violin, piano and oboe, while her siblings rounded out the 10-person family orchestra playing flute, piccolo, French horn, trumpet and clarinet. 

They scraped by busking in public places, parks and street corners while Ralph passed out his apocalyptic flyers. 

Printed on legal-size paper and folded up six times, these flyers contained hundreds of quotes in tiny, squint eyed print: verses from the Bible, the Book of Mormon and other LDS Scripture, and wisdom from the Founding Fathers. 

'A good day [busking] would net maybe $200–300, a bad day $50 or less,' Sheffield says. 

They were so poor that her younger sister slept in a cardboard box.

Sheffield claimed in her memoir that her father 'physically abused us, causing my brothers serious physical injury and deep psychological damage to us all'

Sheffield recalls how her family was so poor and destitute that once had to eat broth made from city park grass and chicken bouillon cubes

Pictured, the only known surviving photo of Sheffield and her dad. After Sheffield left home for good, her parents claimed that she was 'satanic' and photoshopped her out of all family pictures

After he was fired from his teaching job at Brigham Young University, Ralph gave up his flourishing career in secular music to become a street preacher, forcing his brood of children to partake in what he called the Mission. 'I wasn't a busker by necessity, but from devotion to America,' he wrote in one of his ranting essays

Often times her father would get in brawls with other buskers on the street, resulting in him being temporarily jailed. 'But was usually able to bail himself out by, say, pawning his watch,' Sheffield explains.

She vividly recalls once running out of money 'on a blistering summer day' somewhere in small-town western Missouri. 

So hungry, the family was forced to eat broth made from city park grass and chicken bouillon cubes.  

'What bothers me most about that memory is that my dad seemed more upset at the thought of someone finding out about his children eating grass than the fact that his kids were eating grass because he'd failed to provide enough food fit for human stomachs,' says Sheffield in Motorhome Prophecies. 

Things got worse when Sheffield's older brother Peter was diagnosed with schizophrenia. 

Ralph said 'it was God's punishment for being 'rebellious'' because as a teenager Peter liked to toilet-paper homes and get into typical hijinks. 

'It was almost like Ralph developed a sick schadenfreude when the child who caused him inconvenience got smitten with a permanent, debilitating psychiatric illness,' said Sheffield. 

Peter would go in and out of mental hospitals, attempt suicide often and fly into violent rages that resulted in abuse against the family dog, and physical brawls with Ralph and the siblings. 

Sheffield remembers how her father 'seemed to relish the fights.'

Instead of seeking proper psychiatric treatment for Peter, Ralph told the family that 'God would heal our brother's schizophrenia' if they faithfully served alongside him. 

But things continued to get worse. 

When Sheffield was 17, Peter (at the peak of his mental illness), physically assaulted her. Double her size, Peter grabbed her breast, and chased her into her bedroom, demanding: 'I wanna have sex!' 

'It's still disgusting for me to think about it,' writes Sheffield. 'When Peter assaulted me, he was 24, near the age of peak testosterone and male sex drive.'

'I'm 100 per cent convinced our traumatic upbringing contributed to our family's sickness of mind and spirit.'

Later when another brother, Jonah, was also diagnosed with schizophrenia, Ralph blamed it on Sheffield, and accused her of trying to seduce her younger brother. 

'As the years passed, I'd feel guilt for prized moments in my budding career, writes Sheffield.

'After I earned my Harvard graduate degree, occasionally I thought, I would gladly trade in my master's degree if Peter and Jonah could become well again.' 

When the family moved back to the East Coast, Ralph insisted that his family of ten live in a dingy shed despite the fact that there was a 940 square foot house with running water, and mobile home on the property.

By the time Sheffield graduated, she had attended 17 schools and been homeschool

When Sheffield was 17, she claims that her older brother attempted to assault her during a schizophrenic episode 

Inspired by her aunt Charlotte (former Miss America 1957) Sheffield tried her hand at beauty pageants. A failed endeavor which she admittedly said was 'an attempt at escaping her own dysfunction'

The shed had no doors, and makeshift rooms were made out of curtain partitions. 

During the unbearable winters, the family relied on space heaters that were plugged into rough and ready electrical system provided for by a generator. 

There was no running water, instead they hooked up a PVC hose or hauled buckets from the outside ground pump. The 'kitchen' was merely a sink with a microwave. 

'Ralph relished the spartan life—suffering strengthens character,' she said. 

By her 18th birthday, Sheffield was determined to escape 'the Mission' and she began questioning her father's authority. 

'It was a horrible birthday meal; my father got into a screaming match with my youngest sister, Julie, because he said she wolfed down her food too fast,' she recalls.

'To retaliate and teach her a lesson, he picked up his red-sauced spaghetti with his hands and stuffed pasta noodles into his face, all while making yelling, horrid noises.'

Sheffield finally realized that her father was a fraud when she discovered that all of his teachings had been egregiously plagiarized and ripped off of the Mormon founder, Joseph Smith.

Until that point, she had bowed quietly to Ralph's spiritual authority. 

Her first stint away from the motorhome was short lived. She stayed with a friend in Missouri and worked at a local Mexican restaurant to make ends meet. It only lasted one week, she remembers feeling racked with guilt and inner turmoil.

'Up until that date, Ralph controlled his seven other children, including my four older brothers. I was the first girl and first to defy my father by demanding freedom,' says Sheffield. 

She left for good when she applied for Truman State University and got in on a scholarship.

When Sheffield broke the news, they claimed that she was 'full of Satan' and that her 'life will be destroyed' and her 'virtue stolen.' 

'Having your virtue stolen means getting raped,' Sheffield explained.  

Having been so sheltered her entire life, Sheffield said, 'Truman's campus, to me, felt like the dystopian fictional world.'

'At Truman, I grew tired of being the weird one, the girl who didn't drink or have sex despite the ambient fraternity beer parties and raging hormones.'

After visiting a relative in Utah, Sheffield decided to transfer to Brigham Young University for her sophomore year, studying journalism. She immediately felt at home among her Mormon cohorts. 

But eventually, she became disillusioned by the Church of Later Day Saints' hypocritical doctrine, and began questioning the religions beliefs.

Feeling intense shame, Sheffield says she became suicidal, and fantasized about getting runover by a train car during her brief study abroad in London. 

Back in Utah, she took up an internship at the Deseret News, and upon graduating moved to Washington DC where she worked under the late columnist Robert Novak.

Despite her quick success, Sheffield continued to suffer from debilitating depression and was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. 

After Sheffield attended Harvard for her master's degree in public policy, she worked as a financial analyst on Wall Street before returning to her first passion, political journalism

Today Sheffield is a popular TV personality, commonly seen on Fox News, Fox Business, CNN, and MSNBC. Above, pictured with Lara Trump

Sheffield interviewed former House Speaker Paul Ryan on the main stage of 2016 Conservative Political Action Conference 

She began to spiral out of control, living on her own with little direction. 

Encouraged by her Aunt Charlotte, (a former Miss USA titleholder) Sheffield briefly turned to the world of beauty pageants by competing in Miss Alexandria USA.

She cashed out the very little inheritance she received from her grandfather, and spent $50,000 on pageant fees - a failed endeavor which she admittedly said was 'an attempt at escaping her own dysfunction.' 

Shortly after, Sheffield applied to Harvard for a master's degree in public policy and received a full ride scholarship. 

Upon graduating, she became a financial analyst on Wall Street, 'earning unthinkable sums for the girl from a motorhome.'

Nonetheless, she was unhappy. 'I would wake up and go to Wall Street and hate my job, hate my family, hate the world for the toxic and unstable circumstances I grew up in.'

Sheffield decided to return to her first love, journalism. 

She founded BoldTV, a digital media network featuring newsmakers across politics, business and lifestyle news in 2015, and snagged a cable deal before launch. 

With her experience both on Wall Street and the political arenas of Washington DC, Sheffield became a sought after personality across major new networks. 

In 2016, seven years after Sheffield disowned her father, she did what she once believed was impossible: forgiveness. 

'I forgave my father for his actions against me, my mother, and my seven siblings.'