ALWAYS get a prenup... NEVER loan to your in-laws... KEEP a private account: Shark Tank star Kevin O'Leary's five secrets to a happy marriage - plus, when to pop THE question: How much money do you have?

I'm a romantic. I love love.

But I hate debt.

It destroys lives and wreaks havoc on relationships.

And the harsh reality is that financial stress, not infidelity, is the number one reason marriages fail.

The statistics are stunning. Half of all marriages now end in divorce and nearly four in 10 people report money problems as the cause.

So, if you’re contemplating marriage or even if you’re already in a loving union, here are my top five tips for safely navigating your financial love life (without souring the mood).

Shark Tank star Kevin O'Leary (pictured with wife Linda) insists he is a 'romantic' 

ON THE THIRD DATE AND THIRD GLASS… TALK MONEY

Once people reach their mid-twenties, most have already built a substantial financial history.

Don’t assume it’s a good one.

You must talk about money while looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right – and there’s a perfect time to pop this question.

Couples only make it to a third date if there’s mutual interest – that’s when you can slide in a little financial due diligence under the warm glow of romance.

Go out to a nice dinner. Share a good bottle of wine. And two and a half glasses in say, ‘Look, I’d like to ask you a couple of questions, because I’m very interested in you.’

‘Have you ever been bankrupt?’

‘How much credit card debt do you have?’

‘How much do you have in savings?’

O'Leary says a pre-nup is 'the road to success in marriage'

Don’t be afraid to dig. You want to know if there’s a problem.

You’ll likely get one of two answers: ‘Yes, I am financially responsible’ or ‘How dare you ask me that!’

If someone gets defensive say, ‘You shouldn’t be offended. I’m interested in you, and I want to help.’

But if your date still refuses to discuss their financial situation – that’s a flashing red warning sign. I wouldn’t have a fourth dinner.

Ask yourself: Would you want to hook your wagon to a partner who is in financial trouble and irresponsible with money?

I wouldn’t.

What's more, this talk sets the tone for the relationship and makes it easier to have even more serious conversations…

The statistics are stunning. Half of all marriages now end in divorce and nearly four in 10 people report money problems as the cause. Pictured: O'Leary with his wife of 34 years, Linda 

THE POST-PROPOSAL PRENUP

Start marriage on the right foot by discussing what will happen in the event of a divorce.

That may seem counterintuitive.

But it’s not. By being on the same page financially couples can unburden themselves of toxic anxiety.

I’ve invested in companies that create pre-nuptial agreements, not only because it’s a recession-proof business, but because prenups are the first step on the road to a successful contractual union.

A prenup forces each person to disclose their net worth, assets and liabilities and how those assets would be divided up in the event of a split. Even if you don’t get married and cohabitate with a partner, a prenup is essential.

If one day your significant other walks out the door – you’ll have one less thing to worry about. You’ll have your bank account and investments.

Divorce is always hard – but at least you won’t be destitute.

A prenup is a stress remover and a marriage stabilizer.

No, it’s not romantic. But it’s an essential part of maintaining your financial identity - something you should do for the duration of your marriage.

LOVE TOGETHER, SPEND APART

I don’t care if you’re a newlywed couple or grandparents in retirement, it is imperative you never completely give up your financial identity.

This is my number one tip.

You may have one joint account that goes towards a home mortgage, children’s education and everyday expenses, but always keep separate bank accounts, credit cards, and investments.

There is no benefit to merging individual stock and bond holdings. Keep your own advisor and make your own regular deposits.

I’ve never heard of someone giving their partner control over their inheritance, why would you hand over your savings?

There’s no upside to that - only the opposite is true.

Most divorces happen between three to seven years of marriage.

If you maintain financial independence, then you’ll be protected.

Only 4 percent of marriages fail after 10 years – so over time, this rule may start to soften. But in those early years, don’t waver!

And there’s one good way to know that your partner can be trusted with the family nest egg…

O'Leary (pictured center with his Shark Tank co-stars) says couples should only ever have three credit cards between them

CREDIT CARD THROUPLES

A married couple should only have three credit cards: one for each partner and a single shared card with a maximum limit of $2,500.

The joint card can be used for shared expenses like monthly subscriptions, household expenses and entertainment. This card should also have a maximum limit because they’re the most used and therefore the most likely to be hacked.

And above all else, every card balance should be paid off every month.

This isn’t only the way to build good credit, enabling couples to secure loans at reasonable rates – it helps maintain financial independence.

Regularly paying off a credit card in your name will maintain your credit score.

The rating companies that calculate credit scores don’t care about how much you're paying off every month.

They just want to see that you’re not carrying debt.

And if your spouse finishes every month with a zero balance – then you know you have a responsible partner in the marriage business.

BONUS TIP: GIFT, DON’T LOAN!

Familial strife is another potential burden on a marriage – so avoid it whenever possible!

I never loan money to family members because the situation regularly ends badly.

There will always be a cousin, aunt or uncle who needs the cash for their latest investment or business venture.

But no investment is guaranteed, and eight out of 10 start-ups fail, so you shouldn’t ever expect to be paid back.

Broken promises breed resentment.

For this reason, I don’t loan.

I gift. And only with the recipient’s understanding that by taking my money they forgo their right to ever ask me for another gift.

Family and marriage are too important to allow money to destroy them.

Follow these tips and take that consideration out of the equation.