Tube4vids logo

Your daily adult tube feed all in one place!

SARAH VINE: Let's face it, Meghan's lifestyle brand confirms what we all always knew about her...

PUBLISHED
UPDATED
VIEWS

 

American Riviera Orchard. Is this the What Three Words address - that newfangled app that uses three words to identify almost every inch of the planet - for the Duke and Duchess of Sussex's magnificent Montecito mansion?

I've checked, and sadly it's not. But it IS the name of the Duchess's new lifestyle brand, launched on Thursday with a stylish Instagram reel, complete with regal-looking crest and swirly calligraphy.

Blousy pink and white blooms and a whimsical soundtrack accompany an atmospherically soft-focus shot of the Duchess hard at work in a white tank top (ever practical, our Duchess) in her elegantly earth-toned kitchen before we catch a final glimpse of her looking effortlessly regal in a full-length gown. As you do. Move over Nigella Lawson, there's a new Domestic Goddess in town.

The name is somewhat baffling. It sounds like the kind of bonkers moniker a pop star would give their child: Blue Ivy (Beyonce), Daisy Dove Bloom (Katy Perry), Bluebell Madonna (Gerri Halliwell) But no matter. It's Meghan's baby, she can call it whatever she likes.

Meghan's launch video features her cooking in an upmarket kitchen, with copper pans hanging over her head as she whisks

Meghan's launch video features her cooking in an upmarket kitchen, with copper pans hanging over her head as she whisks

Meghan launched American Riviera Orchard - her new lifestyle brand - on Thursday

Meghan launched American Riviera Orchard - her new lifestyle brand - on Thursday 

Because for once, I don't think it's a bad idea of hers. It's certainly one of her better enterprises of late. Ever since the Duchess left the UK, she and Prince Harry have been seemingly unable to move on, obsessed with exacting revenge on the folks back home.

They've turned into a right pair of trolls, too preoccupied with what they've left behind to see what lies ahead, too busy carping about the past to start building any sort of future.

This new venture feels like a welcome departure from that distinctly negative and very toxic mind-set, a return to the Meghan Markle of old, the one we all rather liked, the sassy, stylish, independent woman with killer heels and a career of her own.

Before she met the prince she had her own lifestyle blog, The Tig, and the truth is she was rather good at it. She certainly seemed to be much happier doing that than she ever was being a working royal.

So why not? Why not go back to her roots and take up where she left off, only with a few more strings to her bow, not least the swirly title and princely accessory? It's much more fun than those rather dry, sanctimonious podcasts of hers, and it's certainly a lot less tedious, for all concerned, than endlessly moaning about micro-aggressions.

Besides, someone's got to pay for that expensive California lifestyle, and since Prince Harry's precise skillset does not yet seem to have become clear, someone's got to keep the family in private jets. With a tie-in cookery show on Netflix and a range of commercial spin-offs, this could finally be the new payday the Sussexes have been waiting for.

The launch featured a stylish Instagram reel, complete with regal-looking crest and swirly calligraphy

The launch featured a stylish Instagram reel, complete with regal-looking crest and swirly calligraphy

I'm sure audiences will lap it up, especially when they discover they too can buy their very own cake slice of the Sussex lifestyle. 'Meghan will be making and selling products such as jams', we are told. 'And at some point there will be a book and blog etc.' I would expect nothing less. All jam, no Jerusalem. It's what she's always wanted.

There are, of course, questions about exploiting her Royal title. And it's true, inevitably there will be aspects of such a commercial endeavour that will feel a little grubby in that respect. But we mustn't make the best the enemy of the good, and I would far rather she traded on her royal connections by shredding cabbages than the reputations of the royals back home.

But if this succeeds, she will have neither the time, the inclination nor the need to do that anymore, and that can only be to the good. She will finally be relevant in her own right - and that is really all she's ever wanted.

Let's face it, this was always where Meghan was going to end up. She was never cut out for Royal life: too selfless, too restrictive, too unrewarding for a hothouse flower like her. 

This way she finally gets to be the star of her own show, doing something she enjoys – i.e. telling people how they can be more like her – and funding more of the luxury lifestyle she loves.

Good luck to her, I say.

Comments