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Let's talk about SEX, ladies... Meet the 'embarrassing' mum on a one-woman mission to destigmatise female health issues (and does so by dressing as a giant vulva!)

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Fans of Laura Dowling – aka the Fabulous Pharmacist – will know this is a woman who doesn't shy away from difficult topics. 

The 44-year-old mother-of-three is on a one-woman mission to destigmatise health issues, especially women-centric ones.

As such, Laura, a pharmacist, scientist and founder of supplement brand Fabu Wellness, has shed light in a fun, non-judgemental way on issues that would make many healthcare professionals blush. 

Sharing having a pelvic scan to 100,000-plus followers? Tick. A video tutorial on how to correctly complete an at-home STD test? Been there, done that.

In fact, there's not much Laura won't do to draw attention to things we need to talk about. 

Laura Dowling, pictured right, has skiied backwards down an icy mountain in a Wonder Woman bikini (and made snow angels in a custom-made sequin vulva dress) to highlight the next big date for her hugely popular women's health evening Viva La Vulva ¿ which has already had sold out dates in Ireland and is looking set to fill Dublin's NCH on May 5. Her sister Rachel Mulvany is pictured wearing the vulva dress

Laura Dowling, pictured right, has skiied backwards down an icy mountain in a Wonder Woman bikini (and made snow angels in a custom-made sequin vulva dress) to highlight the next big date for her hugely popular women's health evening Viva La Vulva — which has already had sold out dates in Ireland and is looking set to fill Dublin's NCH on May 5. Her sister Rachel Mulvany is pictured wearing the vulva dress

She's skiied backwards down an icy mountain in a Wonder Woman bikini (and made snow angels in a custom-made sequin vulva dress) to highlight the next big date for her hugely popular women's health evening Viva La Vulva — which has already had sold out dates in Ireland and is looking set to fill Dublin's NCH on May 5. 

But even her very supportive husband, chartered accountant Frank, with whom she has three sons, couldn't quite believe his eyes when she produced the aforementioned clothing on a recent family ski trip.

'He's well used to me and he was like "what are you doing now?" laughs Laura, adding that her sons are also a little mortified of their mother's frankness and madcap antics.

'The poor fellas are embarrassed enough as it is with my talking about vulvas and vaginas all day,' she laughs, adding that there's a lot of testosterone in her house (incuding her dog Carlos). 

'The eldest one said to me recently: "I can't believe you went down a ski slope in your bikini, you're so embarrassing".' 

Laura, from Dublin, explains how she brought husband Frank back to his ancestral home of Kerry with the Viva La Vulva tour in January.

The pharmacist, scientist and founder of supplement brand Fabu Wellness, has shed light in a fun, non-judgmental way on issues that would make many healthcare professionals blush

 The pharmacist, scientist and founder of supplement brand Fabu Wellness, has shed light in a fun, non-judgmental way on issues that would make many healthcare professionals blush

'I don't think he quite knew that was going to happen,' she says of her show, which was in danger of being too provocative for the community (local media refused to speak to Laura about it). The women of Tralee, however, had other ideas – it was a sellout.

'The women just absolutely loved it, it was insane,' she recalls of its success. 

'Galway and Cork were the same, and I got to speak a little bit more about it in local media there,' she says on the stigma that still exists when it comes to women's intimate health.

But this is the whole reason that Laura started this campaign on shedding light and destigmatising women's health concerns.

Obviously, it's not going to be like any healthcare evening you've experienced before, complete with a dancing vulva and confession boxes — not that we'd expect anything less from Laura, who manages to combine education and openness with a healthy dose of tongue-in-cheek entertainment.

'I didn't just want to just call it menopause as there's lots of shows like that and that sounds boring and old,' she says, explaining how 20 years of being a community pharmacist helped her recognise a need for open and frank conversations.

'So I got some interesting people together like comedian Kyla Cobbler, women's pelvic health expert Aoife Harvey, sex educator Grace Alice O'Shea; the Skin Nerd Jennifer Rock, and we have a panel discussion where we answer questions that are written by women in confession boxes during the show,' she says. 'And honestly, women stand up and cry and say: 'I can't believe I've been living with this for so long.'

'I saw that women couldn't talk about their vaginal and intimate health,' she continues. 

Mrs Dowling says 20 years of being a community pharmacist helped her recognise a need for open and frank conversations

Mrs Dowling says 20 years of being a community pharmacist helped her recognise a need for open and frank conversations

'They were coming to me after years of suffering, not wanting to go to the doctor, too embarrassed to even say the word vagina. So when I was doing corporate talks, I started to tentatively talk about orgasms and sexual dysfunction and I could hear a pin drop.

'And I spoke about incontinence, and then afterwards women would be coming up to me in droves talking about the fact they had been leaking for years and were too embarrassed to get treated, or struggling with recurrent thrush infections which weren't actually infections, they just needed a little vaginal oestrogen, that kind of thing.'

So many stories are shared on these nights, says Laura, from the 'angry' young woman who plummeted into menopause in her 30s after having cancer and wasn't offered HRT, to women who were sexually abused as young girls and were 'totally disassociated' from their bodies, resulting in them not ever even having a smear for reasons of shame.

'The night gave them the vocabulary they needed to talk about what happened to them and one lady said that finally, she realised that this wasn't her shame to carry,' says Laura. Although Ireland may have emerged from the darkness of Catholic guilt and the notion that women weren't really supposed to gain any pleasure from sex, Laura says wryly: 'You were seen as a slut if you did, which would have put me firmly in that category,' and adds that we have a way to go when it comes to healthcare for women.

'The medical world is behind and we still have a very poor standard of care for menopause in certain areas of the country,' says Laura, who also has a hugely popular podcast, the Laura Dowling Experience, where she welcomes guests as diverse as menopause champion Dr Deirdre Lundy to Dr Caroline West, a sex and intimacy and sexual violence educator. 

'So you might have someone with a medical card who goes to a doctor and they are a great doctor, but they've no clue how to treat menopause.

'And she can't afford to go to a private clinic. And then you might have someone in their 40s who goes looking for help and are told that they are too young for treatment. 

Mrs Dowling says men need to be included completely in these conversations and we need to help educate them too

Mrs Dowling says men need to be included completely in these conversations and we need to help educate them too

'So there's no standardisation of care, and women are not being told the right thing. And I think that's why my Instagram really took off because I just say it like it is and give as much information as I can.'

The key to change is through education, says Laura, starting in schools ('we are told about periods, but not necessarily about what to expect at the ending of a woman's menstrual cycle'), and also a societal shift in how we view menopause.

'You have this idea that women in their midlife are just dried up old prunes,' she says.

'And it's quite the opposite. Women want to have active sex lives as they age. I've had 70-year-olds come up to me and say: "I haven't had an orgasm for ten years since my husband died, how do I get one?"

'They want to know how to give themselves one, and I'll tell them they need a little sex toy or explore their bodies more, and just for them to be able to ask those questions without shame, you know, it's really enlightening.

Viva La Vulva already had sold out dates in Tralee, Cork and Galway and is looking set to fill Dublin's NCH on May 5

Viva La Vulva already had sold out dates in Tralee, Cork and Galway and is looking set to fill Dublin's NCH on May 5

Mrs Dowling admits that with her focus on health ¿ and the occasional theatrics ¿ she is living her dream

Mrs Dowling admits that with her focus on health — and the occasional theatrics — she is living her dream

WHAT IS THE MENOPAUSE?

Menopause is when a woman stops having periods, and is no longer able to get pregnant naturally.

It usually happens between the ages of 45 and 55.

It is a normal part of ageing and caused by levels of the sex hormone oestrogen dropping.

Some women go through this time with few, if any, symptoms. 

Others suffer from hot flushes, sleeping difficulties, mood swings and brain fog, which can last for months or years and might change over time.

HRT replaces the hormones and is the main treatment used to treat symptoms — which can be severe and disrupt day-to-day life.

Menopause happens when your ovaries stop producing as much of the hormone oestrogen and no longer release an egg each month.

'There are so many issues that come with menopause, from frozen shoulder, achy joints, dry hair right through to mental health, and all this happens around the same time as children leaving the house so up until recently some people might have thought it was empty nest syndrome but it may have been hormones driving you crazy,' she says, of the importance of talking about symptoms.

'There can be a lot of relationships that break down and I still think we need to understand more about what can happen women around that time. And also, there's more negative than positive talk about it and it's more about support and understanding.'

Laura says men need to be included completely in these conversations and we need to help educate them too (there have even been a few males in the Viva La Vulva audience).

'Men love their wives and partners and they want to help most of the time. There's been a few men down the back of the shows,' says Laura, saying that although the show is very 'female centric' men who had experienced it have left feeling empowered.

'One said to me: "I wish I knew this ten years ago", while another said listening to me talk about women's health was the best 45 minutes he'd ever spent as he had a one-year-old daughter at home, and now he had that information for his little girl.'

Laura doesn't just have a big social-media presence, sellout shows, corporate talks and a major podcast to her bow — she's also got her own supplement range, FabU, which she launched 18 months ago after five years formulating and developing the range.

It's a busy life, with 'hard hours', as Laura admits, and her own health is something the self-confessed yogi now prioritises too. 'I love my body, and not in a "I think I'm gorgeous" kind of way - I appreciate it as my vessel through life and want to treat it as well as I can in my forties so it serves me well later on.'

That means exercise, eating well, running with Carlos, morning swims and a little bit of what you fancy, she says.

'I love my chocolate and glass of wine and Indian takeaways, but it's about moderation. And knowledge is a great thing — I was recently diagnosed with high cholesterol, which is a familial, and now I am adapting my diet to that.'

All things considered, life in her forties is indeed looking fabulous for Laura, who admits that with her focus on health — and the occasional theatrics — she is living her dream.

'I used to joke that I wanted to be an actress when I was a kid,' she smiles. 'So I'm having a little fun with that too.'

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