BEL MOONEY: I'm leaving my job after 50 years. How will I define who I am now?

Our brilliant advice columnist Bel Mooney has answered thousands of readers’ letters over the years. But what if the rich and famous turned to her for peerless advice about their own problems?

Each week we invite Bel to look behind the headlines and ponder an imaginary celebrity dilemma that we have made up for her (tongue firmly in cheek). In turn, Bel will take the letter at face value, just as she does with all those that pour into her famous column each week.

She will give an honest answer – so celebrities and politicians, listen up! This week, we imagine what Helen Worth, who plays Coronation Street's Gail Platt, might write in a letter to Bel.

Gail Platt is known to millions as a much-loved character in Coronation Street

... but now Helen Worth will be stepping out from behind her character's shadow after fifty years of high drama and some low shenanigans 

Dear Bel,

They say that you shouldn’t let your job define you – but I fear I may have done just that. For the past 50 years, I have been in the same career as an actress, in the same role in fact. I know that you should move and broaden your horizons, but I couldn’t wrench myself away from the people and street that I became identified with.

In that time I’ve taken part in explosive plotlines – from my husband being a serial killer, to teen pregnancy, to a scam around life insurance.

You’d think, therefore, I would be well equipped for the emotional rollercoaster of leaving – but I feel the past 50 years have flown by and I don't think the fact that I am leaving has quite sunk in yet.

I know many retirees feel the same – but few have been doing the same job for the past 50 years.

How can I move past the role that defined me, and into the new one that will see me though the rest of my life?

HELEN

Bel Mooney replies: What is it like to become a national treasure? Gail Platt is known to millions, but now Helen Worth will be stepping out from behind her character’s shadow after fifty years of high drama and some low shenanigans. There’s a way to go yet, and regular viewers are already speculating as to the nature of the storyline that could finally say goodbye to crazy, lovable, complicated Gail. But it does no harm to look ahead.

The serious point for the future is how to step away from the limelight which you are surely bound to miss. Whether or not you choose to call it retirement, you face one of the biggest changes that can happen in anybody’s life. For somebody well-known (in whatever field) it can be truly problematic when at last the spotlight is switched off and you find yourself in the shadows – which you never really imagined possible. And for people who aren’t well-known retirement can still be very difficult. Even shocking. After all, each of us can feel lost without the role we played all through our working life. Our roles might be small compared to yours, Helen – yet they matter hugely within any individual life.

I think it’s key to start making plans before the break comes. At least you have put your self in charge of the decision – whereas for those who unwillingly face redundancy (or worse, the shock of getting the sack) helpless despondency can take over. It can be a terrible time. But choosing to call time on a wonderful job held for decades provides a useful period for preparation. In your case it’s essential to realise that the famous role was far from being the whole ‘truth’ – and the real Helen Worth is the one who counts. She’s the one who needs to flex her metaphorical muscles now – and stand strong. She’s the one who needs to get creative on her own terms.

Gail (Helen Worth) marries Martin Platt in 1991

That means making plans. Don’t let the change (when it comes) knock you sideways. All of us need to see our lives as a series of stages and remain active all the way through. Whether we want to grow begonias, or catch up with the complete works of Charles Dickens, or finally learn how to bake bread, or fall in love with the dog there was never time for before, or devote real time to meaningful charity work, or finally take Spanish lessons… time must be filled. I think retired people have the right to be a little selfish too – why shouldn’t you think about yourself after a lifetime working? The next stage is YOUR time, but don’t let it stretch emptily when the moment comes. How exciting that the next script is yours to write. I predict you make yourself happy by being busier than ever, finding the real ‘you’ at last and having the confidence to love that role most of all.