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Camilla behind closed doors: Her worrying days with Charles after his cancer diagnosis and the eternal optimism that has made the King 'sweetly proud': REBECCA ENGLISH
She might have hoped her birthday tomorrow would involve nothing more taxing than putting her feet up with her husband.
Instead, Queen Camilla will celebrate turning 77 by popping on her Bruce Oldfield gown and the family’s iconic Diamond Diadem to accompany King Charles to the State Opening of Parliament.
‘It’s not the tip-top way she would choose to be spending her birthday,’ one close friend tells me, ‘but you won’t ever hear a single word of complaint. About anything, really. For someone who wasn’t born into the Royal Family, she’s got an extraordinarily strong sense of duty and the temperament to cope.’
Indeed, that’s something I’ve witnessed first-hand many times over the years, particularly at the end of a long day on tour – a smile, a cheekily raised eyebrow and a look that says: ‘Well, let’s get on with the show.’
It’s been an incredibly tough year for Her Majesty. After the whirlwind of her husband’s accession and coronation last year, 2024 should have been a time for Their Majesties to catch their breath and get back into the regular groove of royal life.
Queen Camilla, wearing the Diamond Diadem, sits alongside Charles as he reads the King's speech during the State Opening of Parliament
Instead, Camilla began the new year facing her husband’s devastating cancer diagnosis and the prospect of losing the love of her life.
Indeed, one source tells me they had never seen her so worried. Not because the King’s prognosis was particularly bad, it should be stressed, but because on a human level, cancer is such a genuinely terrifying prospect for both patients and their partners.
‘When she visited His Majesty in hospital after he first went in for prostate surgery, she was quite relaxed. Concerned, of course, but it was a pretty standard procedure and there was actually quite bit of laughter at his bedside,’ one insider recalls.
Just three or four days later, however, the couple were told that cancer had, sadly, been found.
They spent the weekend together at Sandringham, processing the news privately, before Camilla insisted on undertaking a long-planned engagement opening a Maggie’s cancer care centre in London while the King embarked on a debilitating course of treatment.
‘The public had no idea what she was going through. She was speaking to patients, survivors and even the families of those who had lost their lives to this awful disease in front of the cameras. And she couldn’t . . . she didn’t . . . even blink. That takes serious guts,’ a friend says.
Another reveals candidly: ‘In private people had never seen her so worried. Forget who they are for a second. Look at it from a human level. Her beloved husband was facing a very serious condition. The battle of his life. It was hugely tough.’
But after a brief wobble, she pulled herself together.
Always a prolific letter writer, she began finishing hers with the sign-off: ‘Onwards and upwards!’ – a clear indicator of how she planned to tackle this new crisis head-on.
Widely known as Charles’s gatekeeper, she also became his fiercest protector.
‘His Majesty is never one to sit still and do nothing. He always wants to work and even cancer wasn’t going to stop him. But it’s fair to say that his wife hasn’t always been of the same opinion,’ says one person who knows them both well.
Charles and Camilla appear on the Buckingham Palace balcony after his coronation in 2023
The Queen does a Mexcian wave alongside her closest confidant, her sister Annabel Elliot, left, at Wimbledon earlier this month
‘There is really only once voice in the room that he listens to. And that’s not the doctor’s. She is the only person who can persuade him that he needs to pace himself in order to recover and she’s pretty firm when she has to be. She’s definitely put her foot down as much as she could in recent months.
‘They have always been a team but now you couldn’t get a cigarette paper between them.’
That’s not to say that the King and Queen don’t afford each other space. They absolutely do.
While Charles is content to potter around at Windsor or Highgrove at weekends, Camilla will still often bolt alone to Ray Mill, her private Wiltshire home, known as her ‘decompression chamber’.
She can tend to her beloved gardens, hang out with pals and even walk the dogs without anyone batting an eyelid.
It’s part of a ring-fenced private world that few are permitted to enter, apart from her closest friends and family.
She speaks to her children Tom and Laura most days.
In fact, I understand she is planning, as usual, to take them and her five grandchildren away on holiday to Europe for a week or so this summer, while her husband remains at home.
Unconventionally, she still speaks several times a week to their father, her former husband Andrew Parker Bowles, who has remained an incredibly good friend and sounding board despite their divorce.
Her sister Annabel Elliot is, however, undoubtedly her closest confidant.
The pair are in contact multiple times a day and Mrs Elliot is a frequent face at palace functions – and accompanied her to Wimbledon this week – although she chose not to become one of her official ‘Queen’s Companions’.
Those who have been appointed as one of the new supercharged ladies-in-waiting are, notably, her nearest and dearest pals.
They aren’t just there to hold her bag or carry her flowers, but to provide emotional support and, well, their company because she loves it.
It’s a sign of their genuine closeness that they blow kisses to her, rather than curtsey.
Former nurse and Conservative peer Baroness Chisholm, for example, was Camilla’s neighbour for years.
‘She was horse riding with Her Majesty through those years of challenge when she was not so respected as she is today,’ notes an insider.
While she hasn’t hunted in a number of decades, the Queen is still very much an outdoorsy sort who loves nothing more than walking in the Highlands.
And she is also, surprisingly, a keen ‘wild swimmer’, heading off for a dip in the sea whenever she gets the chance – and whatever the conditions.
Not so long ago, I am told, Her Majesty encountered a ‘smack’ of jellyfish (as the collective noun is known) off the coast of Cornwall. After barely a moment’s hesitation, she decided that even they weren’t going to put her off.
When you have faced the bear pit of public opinion, facing down a few jellyfish in your swimming cossie probably feels rather tame by comparison.
Such downtime is important with a busy public schedule to contend with. On Monday, she and the King flew to Jersey and Guernsey for a two-day official visit, with nine engagements packed in.
Buckingham Palace are already planning a busy autumn schedule, with a state visit to Australia and Samoa in October that will involve a round trip of more than 30,000 miles in roughly 10 days.
Pretty gruelling for someone who admits she still hates flying.
Camilla is pretty ‘no-fuss’ – for a royal, anyway – and has a smaller team behind the scenes than many would expect.
Aside from office staff, in terms of ‘lotions and potions’ there’s her facialist Deborah – and for big occasions she enjoys a manicure, but does her own surprisingly good make-up herself.
She uses one of two hairdressers for official events, Hugh Green and Geraldine Mancini, the latter normally accompanying her on foreign tours.
And she still heads down personally to the salon of leading Mayfair colourist Jo Hansford for regular highlights and a gossip, enjoying the experience of nipping in for her appointment like any other client.
Camilla relies on her long-term stylist, Jacqui Meakin, and a dresser, for help with her wardrobe, favouring tried and trusted labels such as Anna Valentine and Fiona Clare, with the odd evening gown by Bruce Oldfield.
But given her position in national life and on the world stage, as the wife of the head of state, it’s extraordinarily low-key.
The King and Queen laugh together at the Mey Highland games in Caithness, Scotland
Camilla’s also grown in confidence with her public work, pushing boundaries on tough issues such as domestic violence, undertaking visits to refuges both publicly and privately.
Little human touches – such as inviting inspirational child fundraiser Tony Hudgell to tea when he missed a Buckingham Palace garden party earlier this month – are very much her idea.
Of course there are still the naysayers, particularly on social media, fuelled in part by programmes such as The Crown that incessantly re-tell the stories of old. But by now that’s water off a duck’s back.
‘Yes, there’s a caucus of people on social media who use nasty terms and reference difficult times past, but honestly her attitude to that is they are the unshiftables,’ a source tells me.
‘Nobody, not least of all Her Majesty, worries about what they are saying.
‘She has never gone through life looking backwards, she is always looking ahead.’
It is a sensible attitude in the scheme of things – and an optimism the occasionally still Eeyore-ish King adores.
I am told he is ‘immensely grateful’ for the public support that has been shown to his wife while he has been undergoing treatment, and sweetly proud of the way she has stepped up in his place.
It’s unlikely he’ll make too much of a fuss of her on Wednesday given his constitutional duties.
But there’s always their 20th wedding anniversary to look forwards to next April – and perhaps a celebratory dip in the ocean, together, when they manage to snatch a little time off.