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I lived like an astronaut stuck on the International Space Station for the day - and the rehydrated food alone was enough to put me off joining NASA

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They were only meant to be aboard the International Space Station (ISS) for eight days, but two US astronauts won't get home until February

Butch Wilmore and Suni Williams arrived at the orbiting station in June in Boeing's Starliner, but ongoing issues mean the craft isn't ready to fly home yet.

It means the pair may have to endure NASA's strict ISS schedule for the best part of a year, consisting of spacewalks, research experiments and robust physical exercise.

To appreciate what they're going through, I've volunteered to replicate ISS life but down here on Earth, kitted out in UK Space Agency gear. 

From terrible rehydrated food to cramped sleeping conditions, here's why I'd never become an astronaut, whatever the salary

To appreciate what ISS astronauts are going through, MailOnline's Jonathan Chadwick has volunteered to replicate ISS life but down here on Earth

To appreciate what ISS astronauts are going through, MailOnline's Jonathan Chadwick has volunteered to replicate ISS life but down here on Earth

The International Space Station (ISS, pictured) is a large spacecraft that orbits Earth, 254 miles above our planet's surface

The International Space Station (ISS, pictured) is a large spacecraft that orbits Earth, 254 miles above our planet's surface 

On the famous space station, astronauts sleep in small phone booth-sized compartments called 'sleep stations', a bit like man-sized cupboards.  

Each one contains a sleeping bag that is strapped to the wall to prevent it from floating about, thanks to space's low gravity. 

I created my own version, consisting of a sleeping bag secured inside a confined box made up of carefully arranged padding. 

This actually makes for quite a cozy snooze, although next up is my morning wash routine – part of ISS life that I've been looking forward to the least. 

Space men and women can't have baths or showers because the water floats rather than falls, and instead have to dab themselves with a damp cloth.

That means no morning shower for me, which means I'll be smelling like a skunk for the whole day. 

Butch Wilmore (top) and Suni Williams arrived at the orbiting station in June in Boeing's Starliner, but ongoing issues mean the craft isn't ready to fly home yet

Butch Wilmore (top) and Suni Williams arrived at the orbiting station in June in Boeing's Starliner, but ongoing issues mean the craft isn't ready to fly home yet 

NASA's stranded astronauts won't have much time to feel sorry for themselves as they will be thrown into the space agency's demanding daily schedule 

MailOnline creates its own version of the ISS's sleep stations, featuring a sleeping bag secured inside a confined box

MailOnline creates its own version of the ISS's sleep stations, featuring a sleeping bag secured inside a confined box

There are no baths or showers on the ISS; astronauts wipe their body clean by using a wet towel or cloth

There are no baths or showers on the ISS; astronauts wipe their body clean by using a wet towel or cloth 

They say breakfast is the most important meal of the day, and surely 254 miles above the Earth it's no different. 

ISS astronauts subsist mainly on dehydrated foods in vacuum-packed pouches that need to be rehydrated – and if needed, warmed – in an plane-style machine before consumption.

As a byproduct of the shuttle's fuel cells, water is a plentiful source, but dehydrated food also helps reduce weight on the space station, NASA says. 

At breakfast time, pouring milk into a bowl becomes a challenge on the ISS, due to the lack of gravity which gives liquid legs. 

So just like our heroic space travellers, my cornflakes have been pre-packed with milk powder in a small pouch – all I need to do is add water and suck the contents out.

Just add water! MailOnline's futuristic space breakfast pouch contains cornflakes pre-mixed with milk powder

Just add water! MailOnline's futuristic space breakfast pouch contains cornflakes pre-mixed with milk powder 

ISS astronauts subsist mainly on dehydrated foods in vacuum-packed pouches that need to be rehydrated before consumption

ISS astronauts subsist mainly on dehydrated foods in vacuum-packed pouches that need to be rehydrated before consumption

Sadly, the milk mixture is a bland, watery travesty and doesn't beat the taste of fresh semi-skimmed in the morning, but at least I have instant coffee to perk me up. 

Most of my day consists working at my computer station, just like astronauts on the ISS, but it has to be supplemented by heavy exercise. 

In space, muscles and bones can weaken because they don't have to work as hard, which is why long space missions are such a concern for human health

NASA says ISS inhabitants exercise for around 2.5 hours per day, by running on specially designed treadmills, lifting weights and pushing foot pedals. 

Two-and-a-half hours is probably more exercise I get in a week, but I try my hardest to push myself in two gym sessions either side of a disappointing lunch (rehydrated pasta). 

On board the space shuttle, dehydrated foods and drinks make up much of the menu. Pictured, MailOnline's creamy pasta prior to rehydration

On board the space shuttle, dehydrated foods and drinks make up much of the menu. Pictured, MailOnline's creamy pasta prior to rehydration 

NASA says ISS inhabitants exercise for around 2.5 hours per day to reduce the risk of muscle wastage - quite the task for an Earth-bound reporter

NASA says ISS inhabitants exercise for around 2.5 hours per day to reduce the risk of muscle wastage - quite the task for an Earth-bound reporter 

After more work at my computer I tend to my plants – akin to the ISS's Vegetable Production System, a 'space garden' that lets inhabitants study plant growth in microgravity. 

For dinner, I'm trying one of the most famous dishes ever eaten in space – although that's probably for all the wrong reasons. 

In 2015, ISS astronaut Terry Virts posted a photo of his 'space cheeseburger', consisting of beef patties, mustard, tomato paste and cheese in a tortilla wrap. 

Ignoring his questionable use of the word 'burger' here, I try to remain enthusiastic as I recreate his dish to the tee, right down to the position of the fillings.

It looks terrible, like the meals I used to make as a student the day before my monthly allowance came through – but how does it taste?

The addition of the tomato paste is a bit weird but otherwise it's not half bad – like the cheapest item from McDonald's breakfast menu. 

I should be grateful I suppose; the first man in space, Russia's Yuri Gagarin, ate pureed meat from toothpaste tubes as he orbited the Earth in 1961.

In 2015, astronaut Terry Virts' tweeted a photo of a strange-looking 'space cheeseburger' wrapped in a tortilla.

In 2015, astronaut Terry Virts' tweeted a photo of a strange-looking 'space cheeseburger' wrapped in a tortilla. 

My approximation of the 'space cheeseburger created by ISS astronaut Terry Virts in 2015

My approximation of the 'space cheeseburger created by ISS astronaut Terry Virts in 2015

Although it looked like a late night meal prepared by a drunken student, the flavour wasn't half bad

Although it looked like a late night meal prepared by a drunken student, the flavour wasn't half bad

Usually I'd have a beer or glass of wine with my dinner, but unfortunately there's no such luxury for me tonight. 

NASA bans consuming alcohol on any space missions because astronauts need to be on alert and able to react quickly to any potential emergency. 

After dinner, ISS astronauts have about an hour of free time to relax and pursue their hobbies, whether that's surfing the net or playing an instrument. 

There's a classic photo of Canadian astronaut Chris Hadfield playing his acoustic guitar while gazing at the glorious views of Earth, which I try to recreate.

Between 8:30pm and 9:30pm, astronauts are free to relax and pursue their own hobbies. Some, like commander Chris Hadfield (pictured), spend their time playing instruments

Between 8:30pm and 9:30pm, astronauts are free to relax and pursue their own hobbies. Some, like commander Chris Hadfield (pictured), spend their time playing instruments 

But compared to the view Hadfield enjoyed, the view from my bedroom window isn't so stunning, consisting of a dogwalker and a child kicking a football against a wall.

Thankfully, this is where the day aboard my homemade ISS simulation ends and I'm free to go to sleep – in my own, glorious bed. 

I always thought the worst bit about being an astronaut would be the terrifying fire-powered journey into the air at 17,000mph.

As it turns out, the drudgery of rehydrated meals, sleeping bags and constant physical workouts makes daily life a close second. 

With thanks to UK Space Agency for the loan of their branded clothes and my local corner shop for finding me powdered milk.

EXPLAINED: THE $100 BILLION INTERNATIONAL SPACE STATION SITS 250 MILES ABOVE THE EARTH

The International Space Station (ISS) is a $100 billion (£80 billion) science and engineering laboratory that orbits 250 miles (400 km) above Earth.

It has been permanently staffed by rotating crews of astronauts and cosmonauts since November 2000. 

Crews have come mainly from the US and Russia, but the Japanese space agency JAXA and European space agency ESA have also sent astronauts. 

The International Space Station has been continuously occupied for more than 20 years and has been expended with multiple new modules added and upgrades to systems

The International Space Station has been continuously occupied for more than 20 years and has been expended with multiple new modules added and upgrades to systems 

Research conducted aboard the ISS often requires one or more of the unusual conditions present in low Earth orbit, such as low-gravity or oxygen.

ISS studies have investigated human research, space medicine, life sciences, physical sciences, astronomy and meteorology.

The US space agency, NASA, spends about $3 billion (£2.4 billion) a year on the space station program, with the remaining funding coming from international partners, including Europe, Russia and Japan.

So far 244 individuals from 19 countries have visited the station, and among them eight private citizens who spent up to $50 million for their visit.

There is an ongoing debate about the future of the station beyond 2025, when it is thought some of the original structure will reach 'end of life'.

Russia, a major partner in the station, plans to launch its own orbital platform around then, with Axiom Space, a private firm, planning to send its own modules for purely commercial use to the station at the same time. 

NASA, ESA, JAXA and the Canadian Space Agency (CSA) are working together to build a space station in orbit around the moon, and Russia and China are working on a similar project, that would also include a base on the surface. 

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