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Mariah Carey has shared the moving promise she made to her late mother, regardless of their strained relationship.
Over the weekend, the Grammy-winning singer, 55, was devastated by the life-changing news that both her mother Patricia, 87, and her sister Alison, 63, had passed away on the same day.
In Mariah's memoir titled, The Meaning Of Mariah Carey, which was released in 2020, she candidly opened up about her tense relationship with her mother, who was a Julliard-trained vocal coach, and sang mezzo-soprano at The New York City Opera.
Mariah transparently shared: 'Like many aspects of my life, my journey with my mother has been full of contradictions and competing realities.
'It's never been only black-and-white - it's been a whole rainbow of emotions.'
Mariah Carey has shared the moving promise she made to her passed mother (M), regardless of their strained relationship
Over the weekend, the Grammy-winning singer (L), 55, was devastated by the life-changing news that both her mother Patricia (R), 87, and her sister Alison, 63, had passed away
Pictured: Mariah (R) with her mother (L),in an undated photo
Mariah continued: '[Our relationship was a] prickly rope of pride, pain, shame, gratitude, jealousy, admiration, and disappointment.'
She transparently added that their personal strain has lead the performer to experience 'so much pain and confusion.'
Mariah admitted that despite their struggles, still, a 'complicated love tethers [her] heart to [her] mother's.'
The singer also wrote: 'I loved her deeply, and like most kids, I wanted her to be a safe place for me.
'But ours is a story of betrayal and beauty. Of love and abandonment. Of sacrifice and survival.
'I’ve emancipated myself from bondage several times, but there is a cloud of sadness that I suspect will always hang over me, not simply because of my mother, but because of our complicated journey together.'
The singer claimed that her mother's 'jealousy' when it came to her singing career may have caused most of their issues.
Mariah confessed: '[That jealousy] comes with the territory of success, but when the person is your mother, and the jealousy is revealed at such a tender age, it's particularly painful.'
In Mariah's memoir titled, The Meaning Of Mariah Carey, which was released in 2020, she candidly opened up about her tense relationship with her mother (R), who was a vocal coach
The singer confessed that she shared the same 'intense' temperament as Patricia.
She added in the memoir: 'I have reserved some room in my heart and life to hold her, but with boundaries.
'Creating boundaries with the woman who gave birth to me is not easy - it is a work in progress.'
Regardless of their stained relationship, Mariah made a moving vow to her mom in her memoir's opening dedication and wrote that she will 'always' love her.
Mariah lovingly and thoughtfully wrote: 'And to Pat, my mother, who, through it all, I do believe actually did the best she could. I will love you the best I can, always.'
In 2017, Mariah openly shared her 'complicated' bond with her mother with Paper and said: 'Actually, I have had diva moments, and then people can't handle it. I guess it's a little intense, because I come from a true diva.
'My mother is an opera singer. And that's a real diva, you know - Juilliard diva. And so other people that are like, "I'm a diva." It's like, "Honey, you don't know what a diva is - you didn't grow up with my mom."
'And I mean it as a compliment, or I wouldn't be the person I am without experiencing that.
Mariah (M) transparently shared: 'Like many aspects of my life, my journey with my mother (L) has been full of contradictions and competing realities'
Mariah also had a strained relationship with her passed sister Alison (L), and wrote that it was 'emotionally and physically safer for [her not to have any contact [with her]'
'And so when people hear me say, like, "Dahling da da da da," and talk that way - it's kinda like I'm channeling my mother.
'Not that she says "dahling" all the time, but like that voice is - it's like I inadvertently do it, and I don't do it to be disrespectful.
'I just do it and it just happens, and it's like [in diva voice], "I don't even know why."
On Monday, Mariah shared with People: 'My heart is broken that I’ve lost my mother this past weekend. Sadly, in a tragic turn of events, my sister lost her life on the same day.
'I feel blessed that I was able to spend the last week with my mom before she passed.
'I appreciate everyone’s love and support and respect for my privacy during this impossible time.'
Mariah also had a tense relationship with her passed sister Alison, and wrote in her memoir that it was 'emotionally and physically safer for [her not to have any contact [with her].'
The cause of death has not been confirmed yet for neither Patricia or Alison.