How this tragic card about becoming a mother sealed a young girl's death warrant after years of shocking abuse

When Sandra Birchmore learned she was pregnant, she drew the father a card to celebrate the happy occasion.

'Congrats, we are going to be parents! 2021' the text read. It was adorned with rainbow coloring in and stickers of animals. 

The 23-year-old sent a picture of the card to former Stoughton Police detective Matthew Farwell, a married father-of-three with whom she had been having a sexual relationship since she was 15. Within five weeks, she was dead.

Farwell, 38, was arrested on Wednesday in Revere, Massachusetts, accused of fatally strangling Birchmore in her home then framing her death as a suicide on February 1, 2021. At the time, his wife Michelle was eight months' pregnant.

Police allege he was motivated to kill Birchmore - who had tragically lost both her mother and grandmother within the span of a month - to avoid his years of grooming and sexual violence against her being made public. 

Text messages in a 45-page FBI affidavit seen by DailyMail.com revealed he had a penchant for choking the young woman and acted out incestuous role-play fantasies with her. 

When Sandra Birchmore learned she was pregnant, she drew her boyfriend a card congratulating him on the happy occasion

The 23-year-old sent a picture of the card to former Stoughton Police detective Matthew Farwell. Within five weeks, she was dead

The affidavit lays bare the horrifying abuse Birchmore received at the hands of Farwell.

Two other cops, Farwell's twin brother William and their colleague, former deputy chief Richard Devine were also publicly reprimanded in 2022 by Police Chief Donna McNamara for 'inappropriate' relationships with the young woman. Neither have been charged with any offence.

A trove of disturbing messages between Birchmore and Farwell released in the affidavit allegedly detail a sexual relationship which dates back as far as 2013, when he was 27 and she was 15. 

Police claim the relationship was marked by abuse and exploitation, and that her phone was littered with messages from Farwell. A meme stored on his iCloud account even joked about accidentally strangling women to death.

The full, harrowing account of how Birchmore came to meet Farwell - a married father-of-three - when she was 12 years old has now been laid out in a 45-page FBI affidavit

Years of alleged grooming 

Birchmore joined Stoughton Police Explorer's Program, which was dedicated to teaching young people about careers within law enforcement, when she was 12. 

Farwell was an instructor with the program.

An image shared on social media shows a baby-faced Birchmore posing with officers during the program. 

In 2022, 18 months after Birchmore's death, three officers were publicly reprimanded by Police Chief Donna McNamara for 'inappropriate' relationships with the young woman.

Each of the men, Farwell, his twin brother William, and former deputy chief Robert Devine, knew Birchmore when she was a child in the explorers' program.

Devine, who has since retired, said: 'I had no personal relationship with Sandra whatsoever. She never had access to my phone number and I never socialized with her', according to The Boston Globe.

Farwell was placed on paid administrative leave shortly after Birchmore's body was found, and resigned altogether in 2022 after a year-long internal investigation. 

McNamara, for her part, called for all three men to be decertified as police officers.

'All three men — the Farwell brothers and Devine — violated their oaths of office and should never have the privilege of serving any community as a police officer,' McNamara said.

'Through a sustained and deliberate combination of lies, deceit, and treachery, they violated the policies and core values of the Stoughton Police Department, not to mention human decency.' 

Birchmore was vulnerable after the deaths of her beloved mother and grandmother, both of whom died just a month apart in 2016.

At the time of Birchmore's death, she was three months pregnant with Farwell's child

Pregnancy 'complication' 

At the time of Birchmore's death, she was three months pregnant with Farwell's child. His wife, Michelle, was also pregnant with their third child.

Birchmore had created a hand drawn card to celebrate the news.

'How far are you?' Farwell said.

'Regardless of how far we're keeping it. But 3.5 weeks... Which means I concieved [sic] this month,' Birchmore answered.

She then said: 'And the birth certificate is being signed, or hers isn't.' According to the court documents, police interpreted this message to mean Birchmore was aware of Farwell's wife's pregnancy.

Birchmore also insisted that Farwell be there during her labor.

'You are truly the worst person on the face of the earth,' Farwell said during the text exchange, according to the court documents.

At the time of Birchmore's death, she was three months pregnant with Farwell's child. His wife, Michelle, was also pregnant with their third child

Birchmore died of strangulation, and her body was staged after her death to make it appear as though she had hung herself

'Rape, incest' material found in phone

Birchmore died of strangulation, and her body was staged after her death to make it appear as though she had hung herself.

Court documents seen by DailyMail.com reveal Farwell had sent text messages throughout their relationship discussing choking during sex.

His iCloud account, police allege, 'contained images that confirm his interest in domestic and sexual violence, including strangulation.'

Among memes and images found in the account were a picture which read 'When she says ''choke me daddy'' and you get carried away and now she's dead.'

Police also allegedly found text messages in which 'Farwell asked Birchmore to pretend that she was 13 or 14 years old when they were having sex. 

'He also had Birchmore join his sexual role play in which he posed as her older brother and simulated nonconsensual incest,' the court document stated.

On February 21, 2020, just shy of a year before Birchmore's death, police allegedly found a text message from Farwell to Birchmore which asks her if, during sex, she could say 'Matt stop I'm 13 I'm not ready for this omfg please stop.'

In November 2020, court documents allege Farwell told Birchmore: ''Maybe I'll hold you down by your throat while I pound you'', questioning ''how tight'' he should squeeze, texting that he wanted her to feel like ''omg this is really happening and I can't stop it''.' 

Police also allegedly found text messages in which 'Farwell asked Birchmore to pretend that she was 13 or 14 years old when they were having sex

Alleged cover up 

On January 20, 2021, Stoughton Police Department, where Farwell was still working, received a call from a friend of Birchmore's, who revealed the nature of their relationship.

Farwell learned of the call and sent increasingly erratic messages reprimanding her over the incident.

The first read: 'Your friend just called my f***ing work to complain about me wtf.'

Later, he said: 'What is going on? You also told me that no one knew about us yet she claimed we are f***ing.'

Another read: 'She called my job that's insane.

'Why would she call and drop my f***ing name Sandra?

'Like you have no idea how bad what she did is.

The final message read: 'I literally can't believe this is even real life like what else do I have to worry about now? Which other friend will do something tomorrow?'

Within two weeks of that exchange, Birchmore was dead.

Police now allege Farwell staged the 23-year-old's death to make it appear to be a  suicide, which is what it was initially ruled.

It was only after her family hired their own pathologist, who insisted her death was a homicide, that the case was reopened. 

Farwell, 38, was arrested on Wednesday in Revere, Massachusetts , charged with murdering Birchmore in her own home on February 1, 2021

In 2022, 18 months after Birchmore's death, three officers were publicly reprimanded by Police Chief Donna McNamara for 'inappropriate' relationships with the young woman